O’Toole House Chapter 21
“Gab, I need to talk to you.”
James had actually been the one to text her. And she hated that tiny little shiver that went through her when he did, remembering that text to Bradley. But that one wasn’t him and it was over. So when he’d asked her if they could talk after work, she’d immediately agreed.
She had been hopeful for the last fifteen minutes of her shift, even if she noticed Bradley didn’t look well as she was walking out the door. Not a surprise, he was working a hundred hours a week. Maybe she could figure out a way to take some of his work off his plate after she saw James.
But as soon as she walked into James’s apartment, her hopes were replaced with unease. He smiled uncomfortably at her, then led her into the living room.
“I’m leaving,” he said once they were seated on the couch.
“I understand,” Gabriella said, even as a piece of her heart broke off at his words. But he had told them all not to have loyalty to the Foundation and she’d hold that standard for him too.
“No,” he said. “I mean, not just the Foundation. I’m leaving. I’m moving out to Ohio near my parents.”
“What?” she asked in horror.
“It’s for the best,” James said, playing nervously with the edge of a throw pillow.
“But this is your home!”
It was. Foundation or not, James had been born only a few miles from here. He’d lived here most of his life and had never seemed like he wanted to leave permanently.
James looked at her and she did her very best not to cry, but it was a struggle. “I need to go,” he said. “I feel like…I just need to go. I’m sorry.”
“Is it because we haven’t found her?”
That same terror that always filled his face, just for a second, when Adele was mentioned, flashed over him. “No,” he said, shaking his head too quickly. “I mean, maybe? I don’t know. But I think I just need to go somewhere far from here and start over.”
Technically he could. The Foundation had plenty of shell corporations he could put on his resume and his parents were already out there. But Ohio?
“Please-” the word “don’t” almost tumbled out before she caught it and took a steadying breath. “Just think about it, okay?”
“I talked to McGovern,” James said, and her body went cold. “I wanted a guarantee that if I leave, they’ll bring someone else in. He and whoever the fuck else said yes and I made sure Bradley and Amelia got that confirmation too.”
That didn’t mean anything. They could just as easily shrug their shoulders three days after he left and say they tried their best, but no one else was coming. And now Gabriella was crying, even as she tried not to show it. And so was he.
“I’m so sorry about all of this,” James said, staring down at the worn spot on the rug right in front of them.
“James…”
“I didn’t mean to, but I ruined everything.”
“You didn’t…hey, James?”
He looked up and she rested her hand on the throw pillow he was still holding. “Do you remember what Gran used to say?” Gabriella asked.
“‘Think things through, for Christ’s sake’?”
“Well, that,” she said, and he almost laughed. “But remember when things got bad and she’d say everything looks better after a good meal and a good night’s sleep?”
“Yeah?”
“When was the last time you had either of those things?”
“I sleep fine and I’m not hungry.”
She could see the lie on his face, but she didn’t want to condescend to someone thirteen years older than her. He was thirty-six, he was capable of deciding if he was going to quit his job in Massachusetts and move to Ohio. But he was also a guilt-ridden wreck, the sleep he was getting was nearly all induced by huge amounts of marijuana, and there was no way he was thinking completely straight right now.
She went into the kitchen and opened the fridge, as though she had any right to just help herself here. But whatever, the righteous indignation coursing through her outweighed the concern at following social niceties.
There wasn’t much in the fridge, which made sense. James was barely eating and Graham spent most of his time at his two jobs right now. All that was in there were the remains of a pot of soup she’d brought over and wasn’t quite sure she wanted to trust anymore, a few more of Angie’s brownies, and half a stick of butter.
“I made a different kind of soup if you want it,” she said as she went back into the living room, where James was still staring down at the floor. “I left it over at headquarters though. Give me like ten minutes and I’ll go grab it and heat it up for us?”
“Gabs-”
“James, you need to fucking eat.”
She startled herself with that and clearly him as well. She moved a little closer to the couch and risked putting her hand on his arm. He didn’t pull away. “It’s just me,” she said, gazing directly into his eyes. “Please. I know it’s weird for you. But let me take care of you too.”
It was not the first time she’d said that to him. And they’d never actually had that conversation about him trying to keep her from seeing anything wrong with him, like Madelyn had suggested. But she kept her hand in place and she could feel him pressing a little closer into her touch, but not daring to touch her back.
“I’m going to get the soup.”
“You don’t have to keep making soup.”
“Don’t tell me what to do,” she said. “Maybe I like making soup.”
Gabriella smiled at him and he reluctantly laughed. “I’ll be right back,” she said.
“Okay.”
Instead of hugging him like she wanted, she squeezed his arm, then went out the door, peering into the shadows along the quiet street despite herself.
She wasn’t scared of Adele, not the way that James was and had every right to be. She’d seen the way the other woman crumpled when Gabriella came anywhere near her. She was weak. And if she ever dared to come back, Gabriella was ready for her.
Bradley and Graham were both in the living room when she came into headquarters. “I’m just grabbing something,” she called, looking straight ahead as she came up the stairs and went into the kitchen.
“Gabriella,” Bradley said. “Have you talked to James?”
“About moving to Ohio?” she asked, stopping in the kitchen doorway and turning toward him. “Yeah, he just told me. And the ghost of our grandmother is going to make him eat some actual fucking food and get some actual fucking sleep before he makes an awful decision like that.”
She wiped her eyes and went to the fridge, pushing aside containers until she found the ones she’d brought in that morning. They held a creamy spinach and tomato soup that she’d been particularly pleased with when she made it yesterday. There were two containers in there, so she left one and took the other.
“There’s soup,” she said as she brought the container back out into the living room. “Help yourselves, it’s good.”
Bradley was still looking at her. She sighed, some of the fire leaving her. “I’m just going to make sure he eats dinner and goes to bed instead of just laying there smoking all night. If he doesn’t want to come back to the Foundation, I don’t blame him. But, like, Connecticut was far away when he lived there. I think he’s going to get to Ohio, be miserable, and not have it in him to come back here because he thinks he did the right thing. But he could be happy here again. Or maybe he can make his own choice and if he thinks Ohio is the healthier choice, it’s his decision and not mine.”
She rubbed her face, fingers brushing over the thick scar on her cheek. “I don’t even know.”
“You get some sleep too,” Graham said. “Stay there tonight if you want.”
She nodded. “Yeah, I will.”
***
“Want one?”
James offered Gabriella the pot brownie in his hand. She was tempted. The last one he’d given her had been great, she’d just chilled out on the couch listening to music for an hour before getting a solid night’s sleep. But she was on a mission tonight, so she shook her head. “Maybe later,” she said.
James wrapped hers in a napkin and left it on the table, then took a bite of his. He chewed slowly, looking at the out-of-date calendar on the wall. His empty soup bowl sat on the table in front of him, matching hers.
Step one accomplished, but she wasn’t going to mention Ohio yet. They could have that conversation tomorrow.
“Do you want to talk about anything?” Gabriella asked.
James shook his head as he finished the brownie in his hand. “I’m fine,” he said.
“Nobody’s mad at you.”
One again, maybe the wrong thing for her to say because he stopped and looked down at his empty bowl. “I think I need a little time alone,” he said. “You can stay if you want, I’m just going to go in my room. I’ll be back.”
“Yeah, that’s fine.”
He got up and picked up both of their bowls, then put them in the sink. As he walked out of the room, he avoided looking at her.
Gabriella took her time washing the dishes. Father McEnerney was going to bless the Bana house tomorrow and hopefully that would resolve the first part of the case. If O’Toole truly messed up as badly as the reports said, then the house itself was not the problem. A cleansing would stick and let the rest of the family come back as long as Nick Bana stayed the hell away from it.
She dried her hands, then texted Bradley.
GABRIELLA
Do you want me on the new cases or with Bana tomorrow?
He responded almost immediately.
BRADLEY
Bana. I’m not dealing with him
Bullshit he wasn’t. But that was fine. Most likely they’d both end up going.
Gabriella puttered around the kitchen and living room for a little while, though there wasn’t much to clean. About half an hour later, she knocked on James’s bedroom door, which was partially open. “Hey,” she said softly, opening it the rest of the way.
He was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. That brownie had probably gotten on top of him by now. But he turned and looked at her with a slight smile. “Hey.”
“Can I come in?”
“Sure.”
She walked into the room, which was surprisingly clean considering how he’d been the past few weeks. She sat down beside him on the bed and he rolled over and looked up at her.
“I’m sorry this happened to you,” Gabriella said.
“I-”
“James, I’m really sorry this happened to you.”
He looked like he had no idea how to respond to that as he moved a little closer, but not close enough to touch. James had been such a physical person, he was always hugging or touching or giving those little reassuring gestures when things got overwhelming. And Gabriella understood why he was afraid to be touched, but it didn’t make it any easier to see him like this.
“I’m okay right now,” he said softly.
“Because of the weed?”
James laughed. “Yeah, because of the weed.”
“You should go to sleep. You can decide what to do tomorrow when you’re feeling better.”
He nodded. “I’ll miss you, Gabs.”
He didn’t have to miss her if he didn’t leave. But now wasn’t the time. He rolled over and, instead of leaving, she sat against the metal headboard for a moment, just thinking.
“James, do you remember that time I broke my ankle on the playground?” she asked, keeping her voice light. “I was five or six, so you would have been eighteen. I remember falling off the jungle gym and landing weirdly. You were trying to impress some girl from school over by the picnic tables, but I’ve never seen you move so fast.”
She laughed a little, trying to keep it from sounding forced as tears dripped down her face. “Listen,” she said, hurriedly wiping them away. “We know who you are. You’re my family. You’re our captain. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
She glanced over at him. His eyes were closed, but his breathing was shaky.
“Or how about when my dad died and we lost our house and moved in with Gran,” she continued. “I missed my bedroom. And seeing my mom cry, it hurt so much. You helped me set up my new room at Gran’s house, remember? You came over with posters from your own room and hung them up for me.”
He didn’t say anything. “Gran would be proud of you,” she continued. “I’m sure she is, wherever she is now.”
She reached over and scratched his back lightly through his long-sleeved shirt, moving slowly so he could move away if he wanted. Gran had always done that too, whenever any of them were upset or sick. She’d sit beside them, scratching their back as they talked, or maybe until they fell asleep. Even now, years after Gran’s death, Gabriella could still remember it so vividly. For months after her dad died, she’d fallen asleep with tears in her eyes and Gran’s hand on her back.
James sniffed and Gabriella kept her hand moving, her mind still on Gran as she rested against James’s headboard. Gran was the one who had brought the paranormal into both of their lives, into the lives of everyone in the family. But she probably never expected two of her babies to end up doing what they did for a living.
She was so lost in her own thoughts that another half an hour went by in silence. When she finally remembered where she was and why, she looked over. James was asleep, breathing softly as her hand rested on his back.
Gabriella carefully pulled the covers up over him and went out to the living room, where she apparently was spending the night now. Maybe they could talk again tomorrow.
